Friday, January 6, 2012

Local 25-Year-Old Roped Into Fifth Childhood Cartoon Conversation This Week


Boise, ID - Mark McIntyre found himself in a familiar situation for the yet again during this interminable week.

Despite every ounce of sense screaming against the decision, McIntyre chose to make a quick Duck Tales reference during a conversation about swimming pools, which sparked an impassioned discussion about the quality and nostalgia surrounding such classics as Freakazoid, Tiny Toons and Tailspin.

“I watched Rescue Rangers every single day,” claimed McIntyre’s pretentious friend Dan, who never had good taste.

“If I were a ninja turtle I think I’d be Raphael,” said the always-original James who always says the most irritating things at the most irritating time.

McIntyre took a break from the group to scream into his pillow. “On Tuesday Michelle was telling me all about her Animaniacs obsession when she was young, as if she was the only person that ever saw Yakko sing all the countries of the world. Then, like four freaking hours later, Aaron was all amped because he had just spent some time YouTubing “the old Spider-man cartoon,” which really bothered me because there were like three Spider-Man cartoons before that one.”

“Now I am stuck in my own house listening to these people discuss Pinky and the Brain as if they had created the stupid show. It turns out, everyone has seen Batman the Animated Series, and everyone liked it. Just like how everyone ate cereal, slept in on weekends and processed oxygen.”

Before rejoining the crowd to correct their misconceptions about The Tick, McIntyre muttered “I don’t even think they understand how awesome Darkwing Duck was.”

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